Monthly Archives: December 2004

Tired, again, and Still Hating It.

Okay, so in all fairness, I had to get up early this AM to take my car in for service at 7 AM. So I am tired. And it sucks. And I want to go to sleep.

Altered States

I’ve thought of this before, but I suddenly found myself pondering altered states again this evening. While I am not in the mood to really expand too much (tired…), I wanted to get this down and out there so that I would come back to it…

Altered states interest me. While these are typically associated with drug use, the thing that interests me is the possibility of achieving an altered state without a chemical precursor… Anyone who’s had a panic attack knows that the mind can deceive the body, that the problems of the mind can manifest themselves physically. So I am interested in pondering this further. Our bodies and brains are essentially a mass of electrochemical reactions… if the introduction of a physical chemical can cause a given reaction, can’t one learn to harness one’s mind in such away as to reach altered states at will? This is of extreme interest to me. It seems so poignant to me that I had to post the thought immediately, however unclear or absurd it may sound.

I am too tired to keep on with this, but I will place the thought on my back burner for now. Interesting.

Fabulous Life Of…

I’m watching something along the lines of The Fabulous 40 on VH1. It’s making me sick.

Why the fuck do celebrities– READ– beautiful people… actors, actresses, models, singers… why the fuck do they make SO much money??? What do THEY contribute to the world??? Our society is spiraling backward into oblivion. It’s a pitiful thing to witness. The ass-backwards value system of our world. All things are temporary. Beauty is fleeting. We reward genetically fortunate (physically) people. Again and again, as I get older, I just want to cry. Ignorance must really be bliss.

Before it was funny, now I am scared.

Here’s the latest e-mail from Gold’s Gym. Should I be nervous or pleased that they are keeping tabs on me?


You did a great job on working out consistently last week. I know that coming in regularly requires a good deal of commitment; it will pay off for you. Keep it up.

I mean, it’s cool and motivating that they do keep up with me, but it’s slightly annerving to have someone knowing where I’ve been and stuff… Kinda like having a significant other without all the good stuff.


I’ve been pretty good lately about getting enough sleep. Except for the past week. Right now I am tired, and now I realize how much I hate being sleepy. It just makes things that much harder…

Annoyances, part deux

So, writing about things that annoy me is fun, particularly because there are so many annoying things in the world. I also tend to be my most animated when writing about such things… I wrote a paper in ENGL 1101 about my experiences as a Photo Lab Technician that was so animated my professor decided to read it aloud… Anyhow… I mean, I know of two people tops besides me who ever actually read this, so I guess it doesn’t really matter… Yep, I am prattling on and on… Back to my point…

Working in retail brings up a whole slew of annoying things. While I won’t get into specifics now, I’ll give a couple of general annoyances that have rubbed me the wrong way lately.

  • Having too many choices is annoying. Two examples– first, I stood in the aisle of the grocery store for 5-10 minutes last night trying to pick some salsa. There are simply too many options. I don’t understand why we need 20+ options for SALSA. I’d like 6 tops– regular and chunky, each in mild, medium, and hot. Why are there SO many freaking kinds of salsa? Based on my attempt to pick one, they all appear to have the same or similar ingredients. I was so overwhelmed by the options that I gave up. I left with no salsa. Second, a gentleman decided to shop late at the store where I work… He was the last person I checked out. I was ready to wrap up so I could stock the shelves, clean, and go to the grocery where I could be overwhelmed with salsa options. Dude wanted a card game that included craps. Well, we had two different card game suites– by the same company– with no obvious difference between the two. I checked, and they both had similar ratings. The guy stood there examining these boxes, paralyzed by the fear that he’d choose the wrong one. See, we can’t take back software that’s not defective for pirating reasons and such. It took Coolio 5-10 minutes, which felt like 20 minutes, to pick one of the games over the other. I wanted to scream. Too many choices with no obvious differences. Overload!
  • Without getting into a discussion of religion right now, I’ll say this: the holiday season to me is not about the birth of Christ. It’s about spending time with my family and giving them something back for all their love and support. So I hate the presumption that people make when they wish me a Merry Christmas. I know they mean well, but what if I were Jewish? Just tell me to take my Happy Holiday and Shove It, but please don’t tell me to have a Merry Christmas. I guess that’s a small pet peeve, not such a major annoyance. Still, it’s annoying to me.

A Valuable ($$$) Lesson FINALLY Learned

So, I’ve had this affinity for Seven For All Mankind Jeans for the past year and a half. They come in cool washes, and they are long enough for me to put them in the dryer to dry. Unfortunately, they cost $130-200 per pair. Yet, I own 6 pairs of these jeans– sensibility be damned, I like my jeans. However, there is something to be said for good old fashioned Levi’s, to which my loyalty is returning. Three of my six pairs of Seven jeans have developed holes or otherwise ripped for no apparent reason. I bought the three pairs together about a year and a half ago. I am currently wearing a pair of Levi’s that I purchased around the same time, and these show no signs of wearing out.

This is an excellent lesson learned. I don’t need designer jeans worn by all the celebs in magazines. They can afford to replace $150 jeans– hell, they probably get them for free. I can get Levi’s in long length. It’s just a matter of trying. This is one of those lessons that I wouldn’t have learned without such staggering stats– when 50% of the crop is bad, it’s time to start reflecting on why I’m overpaying for something that simply isn’t worth it.

Let it be known now, for all to see, that Lauren has *finally* realized the absurdity of her Seven jeans addiction. Free at last!

Jennifer Garner Article

So if you don’t know, I am a huge fan of Alias, as well as Jennifer Garner’s svelte figure, particularly her arms. Apparently, I have this odd fixation with women’s arms (this was recently pointed out to me), but I guess I just like toned arms. I’m working on getting my own admirable arms (and svelte figure), too, but that’s another story. Back to my point… Oh yeah, just as a note, I think Jennifer Garner is pretty cool as Sydney Bristow, but she’s not one of my all-around favorite actresses, which is related to the article I just read, so I didn’t completely lose my focus.

So, I read a pretty cool article about her with some funny tidbits. It kind of captures how I feel about her, except for the not digging Alias part. You can read the whole article here. Below are some of the quotable lines. The second one was so funny to me that it motivated this post.

  • My girlfriend, for one, thinks Jennifer looks like a man. “Shoulders like a linebacker, a jaw bone like a Tyrannosaurus,” she said the other day when she caught me staring at the poster of Elektra in the theatre lobby.
  • But as far as heroines go, Jennifer Garner is pretty cool. She’s not as ugly as Linda Hamilton, she’s tougher than Halle Berry, she’s not as insane as Angelina Jolie, and she’s not nearly as annoying as Sarah Michelle Gellar.

Missing: One Brain. Left the following note: "See you next year!"

So, we’re approaching the end of my first year working full-time, and I’ve got to admit… I think I’m coming down with something… My symptoms include: difficulty focusing on work-related tasks, desire to leave the office after lunch, a tendency to daydream more than usual, etc. December in an office feels like the end of a school year. My brain seems to have already checked out…

Woe is me. Guess I’ll fix some chai (my new favorite hot drink) and try to focus… wish me luck!

We *are* watching you…

From: Gold’s Gym


You are really dedicated to working out. We are proud of your commitment.